We Sent the Brutally Honest Proposal Instead of the Safe One. It Worked.
There is a version of a proposal that most service businesses send. It is polished. It outlines the scope. It
Here is a thing that happens constantly. A business owner spends weeks agonizing over their About page. They write three drafts. They argue about whether to use first or third person. They add their origin story, their values, their founder photo, a timeline of milestones, and a paragraph about why they do what they do.
And the visitor lands on the page, reads for eight seconds, and leaves.
Not because the page was poorly written. Because it answered the wrong question.
"The About page is the second most visited page on most business websites. Most businesses use it to talk about themselves. Most visitors showed up to find out if you can solve their problem. These two facts are in direct conflict."
The About page is not a biography. It is not a resume. It is not the place to explain that you started this company because you were frustrated with the industry and knew there had to be a better way.
Well. It can be that. But only after it answers the question every visitor brings with them, which is: Is this the right place for me?
That question has nothing to do with you. It has everything to do with them.
When someone lands on your About page, they are not reading out of curiosity. They are doing one of three things:
They are vetting you. They found you somewhere, they’re interested, and now they want to know if you’re real and trustworthy.
They are looking for connection. They want to know if they are going to like working with you or if this is going to feel like a transaction.
They are confirming a decision they’ve already made. They’re basically sold.
The About page just needs to not talk them out of it. None of those three jobs require your founding story in paragraph three. They require clarity, a specific point of view, and a signal that you understand who you’re talking to.
"You have about eight seconds before someone decides if they are in the right place. Your awards from 2019 are not helping with that."
Open with them, not you. The first line of your About page should make the reader feel seen, not informed. Try: “If you’re here, you probably already know that most marketing advice is either too vague to be useful or too expensive to be realistic.” Now they’re reading.
State your position clearly. What do you actually believe? What do you stand against? A point of view is more memorable than a list of services. OBC’s position is that strategy should come before execution and that businesses shouldn’t pay for time they don’t need. That’s not a service description. It’s a stance. Stances build trust faster than credentials.
Show the humans briefly. A photo, a short paragraph, a voice that sounds like a real person. Not a bio. A personality.
Tell them what happens next. Every page on your site should have a next step. Your About page is no different.
Read your current About page and count how many times the word “we” or “I” appears in the first three sentences versus how many times the word “you” appears. If “we” is winning by more than two to one, the page is about you. Rewrite it until the ratio flips.
The obvious thing nobody does:
→ Open your About page with a sentence that is about your reader, not your company.
→ State one clear position or belief in the first 100 words.
→ Put your founding story where it belongs: second, not first.
→ End with a next step. Every page needs one.
"The About page is the second most visited page on most business websites. Most businesses use it to talk about themselves. Most visitors showed up to find out if you can solve their problem. These two facts are in direct conflict."
There is a version of a proposal that most service businesses send. It is polished. It outlines the scope. It
We want to be clear about something before this post starts: we use AI. Constantly. It is part of how